When you’re a college student, winter break can be almost a month long. Returning home for such a long stretch of time can be an adjustment for the entire family. Parents may want their kids back for a traditional family Christmas, while you are anxious to catch up with high school friends and explore their independence.

But your holidays really can be happy. Here are some tips on how to keep winter break as stress-free as possible:

• Loosely pre-plan your break so that your family and friends have the right expectations about who you want to see and what you want to do over the holidays. Ask your family ahead of time what their expectations are for you.
• Understand that your parents expect to spend time with you over the holidays. Don’t disregard your family just because you haven’t had a curfew for the past 3 months.
• Be honest with your parents if your grades from the past semester aren’t as good as they should be. Get their help and support early, before things get too bad.
• Ditto if you’re blowing through your budget and have opened 2 credit cards just to stay afloat.
• Discuss what the house rules have been in the past and how they could be changed now that you’ve been dictating your own schedule (curfew-free) for a semester. Your parents should give you a little slack, but don’t forget that you are back under their roof.
• If you have a younger sibling who has gotten used to getting his way since you’ve been gone, set guidelines for things that may need to be shared: vehicle, big-screen TV, chores, etc.
• As appealing as it might sound, don’t have your mom do all your laundry, make your bed and bring you ice cream while you’re playing video games. Assert your new independence.
• If you will not be able to return home because you don’t have a good relationship with your family, are too far away, or have experienced a recent tragedy, don’t give up on the holidays. Find a friend to stay with or start your own holiday traditions.
• Save some time to relax, rejuvenate and reflect on the past year. After all, it isn’t called “break” for nothing.